Wednesday, September 7, 2011

IWSG #1- My Insecurities

    This is my first blog for the Insecure Writer's Support Group. I'm very excited to be apart of this group. Thank you to Alex for starting it. What a wonderful idea. If you'd like to check out his website here is the link: http://alexjcavanaugh.blogspot.com/p/insecure-writers-support-group.html

   I think that whenever you try something new it takes a great deal of courage, especially if it's something that you really want to succeed in. Writing is this to me.  I wanted to be a writer so bad, I dreamt about it all the time. When people asked me "if you could be anything, what would you be?" I would always answer a writer. What does a writer need to do well... write and that's what I'm afraid of.
    Throughout my elementary into my middle school years we moved a lot. What difference does this make? To anyone who's ever moved to other schools, especially those out of state, you know that they all teach things at different times. Sometimes there were huge gaps in the things that I learned, therefore I suck at spelling and sentence structure. I try my hardest I really do, but I just plain suck at it. (Just ask my "editor" Kelly) (and I did go to college too)  What writer doesn't know how to write?
   I am afraid I won't be good enough. That people will look at my writing and say, "She doesn't even know how to write properly, how could she possibly write a book." The last two weeks I came into a rough patch with my WIP (work in progress to those who don't know, I didn't a week ago.) I stalled on a chapter and couldn't write. Then I started doubting my ability, thinking why did I think that I could possibly write a book. I wasn't a writer, I was a nurse. Where did I get off trying to pretend I was something I wasn't. I had to tell myself repeatedly that I could. The few people who have read my WIP also have been invaluable in their support and encouragement. Also, in the two weeks that I have been blogging and on twitter I have meet so many wonderful encouraging people.
    We all have self doubts and insecurities, I believe it's how we deal with them that says the most about us.

8 comments:

Carrie said...

Awesome post Jessica! I especially love your last line.

I have those same thoughts and doubts all the time. I think I need to join too...

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

That's why you need to stick with us! The online support is amazing. I wouldn't still be writing if it wasn't for my amazing blogger buddies.

regectedriter said...

You are better than good enough. I just know it.
Now I'm going to say something inspirational ::clears throat::
You're Following a Dream. Unfortunately in this life, we don't only have to follow our dreams, we have to chase them. We have to run after them until the soles of our feet are bleeding. Our dreams are meant to be chased.
If you ever have any of those doubts, I hope you'll come talk to me or somebody else so we can kick those doubts in their undergarments and scare them away to clear the path so you might run after them.
Never give up.

Jessica Therrien said...

We all have our insecurities about our writing. I don't think there is a writer out there that doesn't think those same thoughts. My best advice is to just write it anyway. You won't get anywhere without that imperfect first draft. Who cares if it needs editing...every manuscript does. It is the story, the plot, the character development that's most important. I actually gave up in the middle of writing my debut novel, THE DESCENDANTS, but forced myself to finish anyway. Turns out a publisher liked the concept, and it will be out in February. Don't let insecurity get in your way. Think up a good story, and you're good to go. P.S. my publisher told me she had NEVER seen a perfect manuscript. They ALL have tons of mistakes, no matter how hard the writer tries, they can't catch everything.

Jessica Salyer said...

Carrie and Jessica- Thank you. It's nice to know that I'm not the only one.

Alex- Thank you again for giving us a place to feel comfortable enough to be vulnerable.

Regected- You never cease to amaze.

Thank you guys for your support. :)

L'Aussie said...

Hi Jessica, this group is going to be such a help to us all. We all have these insecurities but you have the right attitude. Just know your blogger pals are there to help you, just ask. I've followed you and hope to watch your progress as you follow your dreams.

Denise

Alynza Smith said...

Hello from another insecure writer! Just wanted to drop in and say hello. :)

BillS said...

Jess,

Ugh. I removed my first comment b/c I wanted to re-upload it with my avatar. I didn't know it would leave a trail...

You & I have been through a lot in the past & you of all people know you need to do things to please yourself and do the things that you really want to do.
And now, 3 inspirational quotes from me as well:
"Follow your heart where it may lead for you will be more fortunate than those who don't" - You after each of my girlfriends dumped me

"You are the only one that will truly be around your whole life. Count on yourself & look inward for guidance. Others may follow but if not you will be happy with who you are & your choices" - foster dad

"Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs even though checkered by failure, than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy nor suffer much because they live in the gray twilight that knows neither victory nor defeat." - Theodore Roosevelt